Cost of Living
Original Airdate: January 12, 1987

[Precinct House front desk]

(the duo brings in a young perp)
CHRISTINE: Coleman, bag snatching in Central Park.
COLEMAN: This little creep? Third time in three weeks.
MARY BETH: (who is dressed as an old woman) Yeah, only working after school.
COLEMAN: Flannery, keep an eye on young Dillon here. I'll phone Juvenile and make a reservation.
CHRISTINE: Messages.
COLEMAN: Yeah. Your guardian angel of The Guilty Show.
CHRISTINE: David Keeler has got principles, Coleman. Something, of course, that is totally foreign to you.
COLEMAN: Wrong Cagney. I had a great one at Seventh Grade. Mr. Gardelio!
(Mary Beth and Coleman snigger)

[Detectives' Squad room]

CHRISTINE: (to Mary Beth) I'm just gonna check my messages.
ISBECKI: (looking at a ring binder) This cowboy here. It says he's wired up to think about his mother.
PETRIE: Your cowboy course sounds complicated stuff.
ISBECKI: Yeah, they were complicated men.
ESPOSITO: Did you ever make it with your school mam?
ISBECKI: Me and Ginger have something that is really pure.
CORASSA: Really?
ISBECKI: That is nothing to do with tonight's final!
ESPOSITO: (going off with Corassa) That is nothing to do with the fact that she is creating it.
CHRISTINE: (putting down the phone and going to get her coat) Well, another night of frozen gourmet and basketball.
MARY BETH: What happened to dinner with David?
CHRISTINE: It's not on. He's doing a favour for an old law professor. What do you say I come over to dinner? I'll bring the Napoleon brandy.
MARY BETH: Oh, gee Chris, that'd be great! only ...Harve and I are having a little celebration. He got that remodelling contract. The whole floor of dental officers.
CHRISTINE: Enough said.
MARY BETH: And Muriel, I sent the kids over to her place so that he and I could be alone together.
CHRISTINE: I understand. Tell Harvey I said 'Congratulations'.
MARY BETH: Yeah. Any other time, Christine. Er, tomorrow maybe.
CHRISTINE: Whenever. Don't forget to tell Harvey I sent my best.
MARY BETH: Sure. OK, I'll see ya tomorrow.
CHRISTINE: Thanks. (shouting after her) Mary Beth! ...Wait a minute. (getting a box out from under her desk) I waited to wrap this. Alice'll be cool for it.
MARY BETH: What is this?
CHRISTINE: I bought this for Alice Christine (taking out the contents of the box) Ta da!
PETRIE: It's a baby bouncer!
CHRISTINE: It is! That's what you could call it! Look. See, you hook it over a door, And then, (making an up-and-down gesture) She stands in it.
MARY BETH: Thank you very much, Christine.
PETRIE: Lauren loved hers. Alice'll go crazy.
ESPOSITO: Can I try it?
MARY BETH: Look, Chris, why don't you come out tonight anyway?
CHRISTINE: No!
MARY BETH: Why not?!
CHRISTINE: I'm not gonna be the gooseberry in the place Go!!
MARY BETH: Are you sure? All right. (putting the baby bouncer back in the box) All right then. And thank you so much for this. And Victor! Good luck with your finals tonight, I know the hard part about night school and finding time to study.
ISBECKI: Finding time to study? It makes you sick.
MARY BETH: Good night Victor. Good night Chris.
(Chris picks up the phone and dials)
CHRISTINE: (into phone) Hi, Charlie. ...It's me. I'm sorry I missed you and I hate swapping messages. ...Hi! What are you doing? Screening your calls?! ...Ha. Listen, what if I came over in about an hour and I brought a pizza? ...Terrific!! ...OK. Yeah, I'll see you then. ...Yeah. Right. ...What?!! ...I know! ...Extra cheese. Well done. ...Right. See ya.
JASPER HUBBELL: (coming up) Sergeant Cagney!
CHRISTINE: Oh. Hi ya, Hubbell. What are you doing? Slumming?
JASPER HUBBELL: No. But I've got some good news. Looks like we're finally gonna get our shot at Mansfield.
CHRISTINE: The prelim. Hot damn!!!
JASPER HUBBELL: Mm hm.
SAMUELS: (coming out of his office) Jasper!
JASPER HUBBELL: Oh! Bert, you're looking well.
SAMUELS: Well, you're not looking any thinner. What is this? A social call?
CHRISTINE: No! We're finally gonna get to fix Mansfield.
JASPER HUBBELL: I don't want the Defence to get over-confident. All I wanna do is get through this preliminary hearing with both charges in tact.
SAMUELS: Come on into my office. So what are you saying? We're going in weak.

[Samuels' office]

CHRISTINE: We caught that skunk mid deal! All we've gotta do to lock him away is to testify.
JASPER HUBBELL: It's the way that you got to the warehouse that could become a problem.
CHRISTINE: What problem? My informant gave information. I followed through on it. We made the arrest. It was a clean deal.
JASPER HUBBELL: Too bad that your informant can't testify.
CHRISTINE: Oh, I get it. You came down here to do your little DA dance before you plea-bargain Mansfield out on to the street again.
SAMUELS: Cagney.
JASPER HUBBELL: Sergeant, this prelim is not going to be a walk-through. First, there is the history of your entrapment. And second the man has serious money, and that buys him precious help.
CHRISTINE: I will do whatever it takes. I don't want him to get away again.
JASPER HUBBELL: I'm glad to hear that. (shaking Samuels hand) Bert. Sergeant.
(Hubbell leaves)
SAMUELS: Relax Cagney. ...Luck. ...Right judge.
CHRISTINE: (as they sit down) One that has the taste of blood. (after a short silence) Wanna have a cup of coffee?
SAMUELS: Good idea.
(Chris smiles and pulls her chair closer to the desk. Samuels gets a couple of mugs and a couple of bottles out of his desk)
SAMUELS: I know that you blame Mansfield for the death of your informant.
CHRISTINE: Well maybe he didn't shoot him himself. He still got killed.
SAMUELS: (pouring two generous shots) Now don't get too hot about your personal statements. You don't wanna lose sight of the lead trial, do ya?
CHRISTINE: I understand that, Lieutenant. I just wanna see Mansfield's butt kicked all the way to Attica.
SAMUELS: (handing her a mug) To crime!
CHRISTINE: Here's to living!

[Broadway]

(Mary Beth gets to Broadway-Lafayette Street subway station, looks at her watch and then runs across the road)

[Wine store]

CRAVEN: (to a customer) This wine. This is nice. This'll work for you. You try this. You'll like that. (seeing Mary Beth come in) Good evening, ma'am.
MARY BETH: How are ya?
CRAVEN: Good. How about yourself? See what you want?
MARY BETH: I don't know. What would go nice with London broil and scalloped potatoes?
CRAVEN: Personally ...I like cream soda. But you came in for wine. OK. I got a red for you as dry as the Sahara (Mary Beth mouth drops) and you don't have to be a sheikh to pay for it. (Mary Beth then begins to get very uneasy) I also have another beauty here. (he takes a bottle from the shelf, there is a man stocking the shelves beyond him) Ah, here she is. (calling to the man) Collins. Price these up, please. (Mary Beth turns her face away from Collins) You know, we can't charge extra to the customers. (seeing Mary Beth making to leave) Ma'am?
MARY BETH: I'm sorry, I changed my mind.
(Mary Beth rushes out)

[Detectives' Squad room]

(Chris is still working away)
DAVID KEELER: (coming in) Detective Aspromante.
ASPROMANTE: Yes.
DAVID KEELER: I'm David Keeler. Remember me? I just called.
ASPROMANTE: Oh, yeah! To see Cagney?
CHRISTINE: (yelling out) Hi!!!
DAVID KEELER: (to Chris as she rushes up) Hi.
CHRISTINE: How did you know I'd still be here?
DAVID KEELER: (taking her hand) I wasn't sure.
CHRISTINE: I thought you were going to see your old professor. Did it go all right.
DAVID KEELER: Well, he told me what he wants.
CHRISTINE: I wish you'd have called. I'm on my way over to Charlie's for a pizza.
DAVID KEELER: Listen, Chris. I need to talk to you.
CHRISTINE: (suggestively) Do you want to get together later?
DAVID KEELER: We need to talk now.
CHRISTINE: OK. Sit! ...Talk.
DAVID KEELER: I have a job to do that you're not going to like.
CHRISTINE: I don't like most of your jobs.
DAVID KEELER: It's one of your cases, Chris.
CHRISTINE: What does the ACLU have to do with me?
DAVID KEELER: This is a private case. My old law professor, Ben Tolman, has asked for my help. I wouldn't do it, Chris. unless I really thought I had to.
CHRISTINE: Sure.
DAVID KEELER: It's the Mansfield case.
CHRISTINE: Joke, right?
DAVID KEELER: No. Ben arranged the scholarship that got me through law school when I was broke and then he got me my first job. I owe him, Chris. I owe him a lot! Ben was like a father to me and now he's asking for my help. (Chris gets up and walks away. David gets up) He came to me as a last resort. I couldn't turn him down. (as Chris puts her coat on) Chris!! Here, wait a minute!!! Did you hear what I was saying? Or don't you care?
CHRISTINE: (coming up to him) You spit in my face and then you ask if I care. What I do care about is that some...
DAVID KEELER: Wait a minute...
CHRISTINE: You're gonna be standing in court busting your butt to free some low life piece of scum who tried to murder me!! Now, what do you care about, David?!
DAVID KEELER: (stopping her going past him) Oh Chris, I care about you. This is very hard for me. So, please, for once, try to understand what I'm feeling.
CHRISTINE: What is there for me to understand?
DAVID KEELER: It's like you and Charlie, when he asks for your help.
CHRISTINE: How can... How can you compare my flesh and blood with your old teacher!
DAVID KEELER: You love Charlie and you would do anything for him. I feel the same way about Ben. There was a time in my life when he was the only one there for me!
CHRISTINE: How come I never heard of this saint before?
DAVID KEELER: (as Chris walks out past him) Because I don't tell you everything. (shouting after him) The same way you don't tell me!!
CHRISTINE: (turning back) I'm telling you, I busted Mansfield twice!! The first time he beat me like I was a lousy cop. And now he has you on his payroll.
DAVID KEELER: This is an honest fight in open court. It has nothing to do with you or me.
CHRISTINE: The hell it doesn't!!! You're trading on my skin to pull a fat fee!!
DAVID KEELER: Money is not an issue here! I am talking about loyalty!
CHRISTINE: To who?!!! Mansfield is a drug-dealing skunk and he will be put away regardless of you or your old professor.
DAVID KEELER: You've got it all figured out. Fine. Just give me the arrest report. That's all I came for.
CHRISTINE: I'm off-duty.
(she walks out)

[Laceys' dining room]

HARVEY: The X-ray equipment is really heavy and the guy I was bidding against never figured any extra floor support so that's why I got the job! I mean, Mary Beth, you've just got to see the whole pic... (as Mary Beth shakes pepper heavily over her plate) What are you doing, honey? You're ruining a great piece of meat there.
MARY BETH: Everything turned out so bland, Harvey.
HARVEY: Are you OK?
MARY BETH: Harvey, I am so proud of you. You're dynamic, Harve, and people notice that. And that's why things are taking off for you.
HARVEY: Oh no, baby, for us. Honey, do you know what can happen now? Who do dentists hang out with at country clubs? ...The real money guys? Doctors! And what do doctors do with their money? They put it into real estate and then develop it. And who does that? The contractors! The contractors who they've heard about from their buddies...
MARY BETH: (who has tried to look interested) The dentists!!!
HARVEY: The dentists!!
(they laugh, Mary Beth with difficulty)
MARY BETH: (handing him a glass) Here's a toast to you, Harve, ...and to our future. And I'm sorry I forgot the wine. I... I just couldn't make up my mind. You know. Red, white, rosé. Who knows what goes with what these days? Also I couldn't remember what your favourite was besides beer. We could have a beer!!
(Mary Beth rushes to into the kitchen)
HARVEY: Honey, it's OK.
MARY BETH: (as she gets two beers from the fridge) No, Harvey, you deserve a toast. And it's not the same when it's a toast, it's alcohol. I mean with water it wouldn't be the same.
HARVEY: (as she puts the beers in front of him) Mary Beth, would you calm down. Are you OK?!!
MARY BETH: I'm fine. I couldn't be better. I'm so happy about everything, Harvey. So here, (bringing two clean glasses) here's a toast to er ...us, and to our terrific life (she pours the beers) and our sweet precious kids, who I care about more than anything.
(they chink glasses in which the beer is nearly all head)
HARVEY: To you, babe.
MARY BETH: I should have poured that down the side.
HARVEY: It's a real Coney Island head.
MARY BETH: Go ahead and eat.

[Charlie's apartment]

(Chris is unpacking the pizza)
CHARLIE: Who cooked it? The old man or the kid?
CHRISTINE: Hey, Charlie, how am I supposed to know?
CHARLIE: (looking at the pizza) The kid. He don't know well done. (diving into the brown bag) Hey, what's this stuff?! We usually have beer with pizza. (taking two off a six-pack of bottled tomato juice) Hey, you're not going good guy because of me, are you? I tell you, Chrissie, I'm right on top of things.
CHRISTINE: Is that right, Pop? Is that why you're hanging out at Flannery's, buying a round for the guys?
CHARLIE: I knew it! I knew that was gonna get back to you. Now listen, Chris. I went in there I bought the guys a drink. I even ordered a shooter for myself, but I never touched it, I swear it, not a cent. Anybody who says I did is a liar. You always drink beer with pizza.
CHRISTINE: Look, Charlie, this is better for us. (raises the tomato juice bottle) OK? Pure calories.
CHARLIE: You forgot the anchovy!
CHRISTINE: What...
CHARLIE: Never mind. What kind of day did you have?
CHRISTINE: I had the worst day I've had in years.
CHARLIE: (eating a mouthful of pizza) Mmmm! Mmmmmm!!
CHRISTINE: Huh? Perfect, huh? (getting up) Wait a minute.
CHARLIE: (following her) What do you need?
CHRISTINE: (she takes two glasses from a kitchen cupboard) At least we could have a glass.
CHARLIE: (taking the glasses) OK. (she goes back and opens a drawer) What now?!
CHRISTINE: I want a napkin.
CHARLIE: I guess I'm out.
CHRISTINE: (going back to the cupboard) Well right. We'll make do with paper towel.
(Charlie closes the cupboard door after Chris has taken the roll of paper towel out. Chris reopens it)
CHARLIE: What's the matter? (Chris finds a spirit bottle right at the back of the cupboard)
CHARLIE: Holy cow!! It was right at the back there. I forgot all about it! It's the old Kentucky.
CHRISTINE: (giving him the bottle) Pour it out, Charlie.
CHARLIE: Huh?
CHRISTINE: Pour ...it ..out.
CHARLIE: Sure. (he tips it down the sink) OK?
CHRISTINE: Yeah. (as she goes through the door) Good night, Pop.
CHARLIE: Christine.

[Squad car]

(Mary Beth is driving)
MARY BETH: This Professor Tolman must be very important to David.
CHRISTINE: So what? hhe puts everything on hold to my make life miserable?
MARY BETH: He must have thought it through, Christine. The man was his teacher.
CHRISTINE: I don't care if he was his priest! I wanna make sure Mansfield does so much time, he's gonna need a walker when he's finally released.
MARY BETH: Chris you can't even the score over him.
CHRISTINE: Mary Beth, why didn't we go down West Houston St.?
MARY BETH: I've gotta make a quick stop. ...It's a couple of blocks.
CHRISTINE: All right.

[Wine store]

CRAVEN: Hi!
MARY BETH: (startled. She hasn't noticed the storeowner) Oh!
CRAVEN: You need something for the London broil.
MARY BETH: Ha. Right, sir! No. No thanks. No, ...not today. (she looks round to see if anybody else is there) I'm Detective Lacey, Fourteenth Squad. Does a Gilbert Collins work here?
CRAVEN: Yes, but he's out on a delivery.
MARY BETH: He's out?
CRAVEN: Yeah, is there a problem?
MARY BETH: No, nothing like that. Are you the manager?
CRAVEN: Worse! The owner. Look, Officer, if there's a problem with Collins, I'll dump him. He's only on minimum wage pay.
MARY BETH: There is no problem. It's routine, Mr....?
CRAVEN: Craven.
MARY BETH: Craven. I wanted a few words with him, that's all. What are his hours?
CRAVEN: Ten to six. Do you want me to have him call you?
MARY BETH: No! No, Not necessary.
CRAVEN: Ciao!

[Microfiche reader room, Criminal Courts Building]

(the duo are at separate readers)
CHRISTINE: Look at this. All high-powered attorneys. Never used the same one twice. Not one of them is connected with drug dealers. Mary Beth? (she goes over to Mary Beth) What have you got?
MARY BETH: It's an old case. Nothing.
CHRISTINE: Nineteen seventy-one. Mansfield?
MARY BETH: No. When I was in uniform. One of my first rape cases.
CHRISTINE: A big collar for you, Mary Beth.
MARY BETH: Yeah.
CHRISTINE: (reading from the screen) 'I'll find you, lady, and I'll hurt you in ways you never dreamed of'. He said this in open court?
MARY BETH: Yeah.
CHRISTINE: (stopping Mary Beth from switching the reader off) 'I'm gonna carve my name in your face'. How much time did this guy get?
MARY BETH: He's out!

[Detectives' Squad room]

CHRISTINE: (into phone) You've been a tremendous help, Mrs. Kauffman. Collins has been working in my precinct and has not registered here yet. You just make sure he does, please. (she rings off. Petrie, Isbecki, Corassa and Esposito are all gathered round the duo's desks) The parole officer is on the job. He's been here two months in New York.
MARY BETH: Two months?
CHRISTINE: Yes, well, it was nice of you to let them know.
ISBECKI: There's a better way to handle this.
MARY BETH: What are you talking about?
ISBECKI: The direct approach. We mosey over there. We look him in the eye and let him know you've got friends.
MARY BETH: Victor, this is not Dodge City.
CHRISTINE: Wait a minute. From what you said, it's not far off. Clean. Simple. And Collins'll certainly get the hint.
MARY BETH: I think all of yous are making too much of it.
ISBECKI: This isn't just your problem, Lacey. A creep threatens a cop, it puts us all under a threat. I don't take threats.
PETRIE: Mary Beth, The Lieutenant could call the One-One-Nine and put a blue-and white in front of your house all night.
ESPOSITO: That's a good idea, Marcus.
MARY BETH: No! I don't want that, Marcus. And I don't want the Lieutenant hearing about this either. ...Sergeant.
CHRISTINE: The man said he'd carve up your face, Detective.

[Chris's loft]

(there is a knock at the door)
CHRISTINE: Who is it?
DAVID KEELER: Your favourite lawyer.
CHRISTINE: (having opened the door) Well, David?
DAVID KEELER: Don't I get invited past the door?
CHRISTINE: I was getting ready to go to bed.
DAVID KEELER: I deserve at least a couple of minutes.
CHRISTINE: (having let him in) So?
DAVID KEELER: So. (coming close to her) The simple truth. ...I didn't take this job to hurt you or ...jeopardise our relationship.
CHRISTINE: So now you know you've managed to do both.
DAVID KEELER: This is one of the toughest decisions I've had to make.
CHRISTINE: (almost tearful) Well, it's too bad you didn't make the right one.
DAVID KEELER: Chris, I'm hurting too. ...I really care about you. The job I have to do doesn't change that.
CHRISTINE: It does for me.
DAVID KEELER: Chris, it's just work. That's all. You understand, that, me doing this job, means everything for Ben Tolman, but it doesn't have to mean that much to us.
CHRISTINE: (pushing his hand off as he tries to get closer) Taking Mansfield down means everything to me. ...What about me?! Do you need a father or do you need ...a woman?!
DAVID KEELER: (grabbing her and hugging her to him) You are the most immature woman I've ever met!
CHRISTINE: (pushing him off) Stop it! Damn it!!! The man tried to kill me!! You understand?! I guess you can't. But until somebody aims a gun (giving him a push in the head) and pulls a round off at you, you never will!!
DAVID KEELER: Don't wave that comic cross at me! And don't put guilt where it doesn't belong.
CHRISTINE: You're the one that should feel guilty here.
DAVID KEELER: You were the one the that pushed Hector on Mansfield until he got himself killed!!!
CHRISTINE: Oh, you bastard. You believe that?! Who the hell are you to say that to me?!!!
DAVID KEELER: I don't know. I don't know what I am to you!! Maybe nothing more than a sex partner. Somebody who's gonna pat you on your head every time you have a bad day!! But when I come to you with something important, all I get from you is 'Me, me, me'!!!
CHRISTINE: (opening the door) Get out of here, David.
DAVID KEELER: (as he goes, sarcastically) Get out!!
(Chris pours herself a slug of Scotch)

[Detectives' Squad room]

(the next morning Chris walks in very gingerly)
WENDEL: (giving Chris a cup of coffee) Today is a very special day for your...
ESPOSITO: (coming up ) Certainly is a very special day for you, Wendel. (escorting him away) Come on.
CHRISTINE: A perp?
ESPOSITO: No, Wendel's a genuine gypsy royal.
WENDEL: I know what I know.
ESPOITO: How come you didn't know I was a cop when you offered to bless my wallet? Come on, move it.
(Chris's phone is ringing)
CHRISTINE: (into phone) Cagney. Fourteenth. ...My father? ...Yeah. Fine. ...I'm kind of busy right now. ...What? ...Yeah, I know you're sorry, Pop, but that isn't the point. ...Yeah. ...All right. ...Pop, I said 'All right'! ...All right, now. I'll see you there.
MARY BETH: (breezing in) Good morning, Christine.
(Chris winces as Mary Beth slams a brown bag down on her desk)
CHRISTINE: That's one of the silliest statements I've ever heard. Do you have any aspirin?
MARY BETH: Christine, get a load of this. (holding up a pair brass doorknobs from the bag)
CHRISTINE: No, doorknobs are for police chiefs. I need aspirin.
MARY BETH: It's not for his door. it's for the class party on Friday. Do you remember these? These were on every classroom door in the City of New York.
CHRISTINE: Great.
MARY BETH: There they were. A whole box of them outside a store on Canal. Two dollars each. I'm gonna put these on our bedroom door. Harvey is gonna pass out when he sees this. Brings back memories, don't they?
CHRISTINE: I remember them. Every door.
COLEMAN: (tossing a message down in front of Chris) Mr Principal ...of Disaster Brigade. (seeing the doorknob) Oh, aren't these terrific? Solid brass. Hey, I'm gonna put these on my bathroom door. Did you get these from Esposito, ten bucks a pair?
MARY BETH: Ten bucks?
COLEMAN: Yeah, I'm still not sure I can trust that little humdinger, you know?
MARY BETH: (looking across at Esposito) Morning. (as Chris addresses an envelope and puts a theatre ticket in it) Is that a Broadway show?
CHRISTINE: Yeah. My one and only for Saturday night. David gave it me as a peace offering.
MARY BETH: (as Chris tears up the note that was with the ticket) Well, that's a nice little gift.
CHRISTINE: Got a stamp on you?
MARY BETH: Right in there.
CHRISTINE: Thank you. We'd better go.
MARY BETH: I'm really gonna enjoy watching Mansfield take this fall.
CHRISTINE: You're very up this morning.
MARY BETH: Why not? (as they go out) It's gonna be a good day.
WENDEL: (calling after them) I know I know.

[Precinct House yard]

MARY BETH: You arrest people. He defends people. You have to expect some disagreement.
CHRISTINE: This is more than a disagreement.
MARY BETH: You know what I'm saying. You and David are still gonna be around long after this Mansfield business is over and done with.
CHRISTINE: Sure. When we get the win, maybe I'll call him up and gloat.
MARY BETH: You can't say fairer than that.
(they get into the Squad car)
MARY BETH: Sergeant.
CHRISTINE: What? ...I'm buckling, all right? I'm buckled.

[Squad car]

(on their way to court)
CHRISTINE: Where are you going?
MARY BETH: If we take the FDR we can look at the river.
CHRISTINE: Are you into tugboats? Or is it that liquor store.
MARY BETH: I haven't given that a thought since last night.
MARY BETH: Christine, there is nothing I can do about Collins being around. I am not gonna make it worse by thinking about it.
CHRISTINE: Mary Beth, you cannot let that cheap little creep intimidate you. The more you hide, the bigger he gets, and you know I know what I'm talking about here.
MARY BETH: I'm not hiding, Christine.
CHRISTINE: If you face him you can handle it.

[Courthouse corridor]

JASPER HUBBELL: Ah! good morning, ladies.
CHRISTINE: Good morning.
JASPER HUBBELL: Oh, Sergeant, there is something about Mansfield's choice of counsel. It could be very helpful.
CHRISTINE: Good. Anything to get that skunk.
JASPER HUBBELL: Yeah, well anything can happen. We've got a couple of strong charges here, and I expect a straight-ahead committal.
PROCESS SERVER: (chasing after them) Excuse me. Sergeant Cagney?
CHRISTINE: Yeah.
PROCESS SERVER: Detective Lacey?
MARY BETH: Yes ma'am.
PROCESS SERVER: These are for you.
(she gives them each a document)
JASPER HUBBELL: Sub poenas. You just take 'em. Watch your memo books, ladies.
MARY BETH: (seeing David Mansfield and another man coming down the corridor) Let's go on in, Sergeant.
CHRISTINE: (waving her subpoena as she comes up to them) Nice touch. Very dramatic. Do you really think it's gonna make a difference?
DAVID KEELER: Morning Sergeant Cagney. Detective Lacey.
MARY BETH: Come on, Chris.
CHRISTINE: (looking at the other man) The renowned Professor Tolman. Down from your ivory tower to roll around in the mud with Mansfield here.
BRUCE MANSFIELD: Oh, now, all this unpleasantness. This occasion is, Sergeant,... You mustn't forget your upbringing.
CHRISTINE: Unpleasant? Today's the start of a nightmare for you.
BRUCE MANSFIELD: Oh, ho, ho, ho, ho. You do have a certain girlish charm, Sergeant.
(they go in)

[Courtroom]

DAVID KEELER: Where did you arrest Mr. Mansfield, Sergeant Cagney?
CHRISTINE: I'm sure that's on the arrest report.
DAVID KEELER: You arrested my client inside a warehouse.
CHRISTINE: That's right.
DAVID KEELER: Was there a bazaar, a flea market, maybe an antique show or a public gathering going on?
CHRISTINE: No.
DAVID KEELER: None of these. Not even a sign saying 'Open House'?
CHRISTINE: Can we drop the games, David, I've already answered 'No'!
JUDGE THOMAS: Sergeant, I'd advise you to control yourself.
CHRISTINE: Sorry.
DAVID KEELER: Then maybe you will tell us exactly what right you felt you had to enter a warehouse on private property.
CHRISTINE: Detective Lacey and I had 'Probable cause' to believe that a crime was being committed.
DAVID KEELER: If that were an acceptable explanation, Sergeant, no one would be able to sleep. There's be the sound of doors being kicked in all over the City.
(Mansfield sniggers)
CHRISTINE: If you're asking accuracy, Counsellor, your note would indicate that we entered through an open door.
DAVID KEELER: Actually you drove through an open door. Why?!
CHRISTINE: We were acting on information from a reliable informant that a drug transaction was going down.
DAVID KEELER: Ah! An informant whose information resulted in an arrest in other cases?
CHRISTINE: No.
DAVID KEELER: No? Then how did you know he was reliable? I suggest this person appears in this court so we might determine the value of his information.
CHRISTINE: You know that he can't appear! He's dead, Your Honour. (shouting after David) He's dead because of your client!!
JUDGE THOMAS: Sergeant Cagney, please. Control yourself.
DAVID KEELER: Your Honour, because Sergeant Cagney's testimony confirms the violation of the law of search and seizure, I motion that all charges against my client be dropped at this time.
(later)
JUDGE THOMAS: Based on all the testimony, I agree that the narcotics case against Mr. Mansfield has been compromised and it is hereby dismissed.
JASPER HUBBELL: Your Honour, surely you agree that the attempted murder charge against Mr. Mansfield must be held outside of this ruling.
DAVID KEELER: Your Honour, I object! As charged, and directly from the illegal action of Sergeant Cagney and her partner in entering that warehouse.
JASPER HUBBELL: Your Honour, the simple fact is, Mansfield fired at Sergeant Cagney even though he knew her to be a police officer.
JUDGE THOMAS: Gentlemen. (they both sit down) I agree with Mr. Hubbell. This court will not, and cannot allow anyone to view the police as viable targets. Mr. Mansfield is hereby bound over for trial on the charge of attempted murder. Court adjourned.
MARY BETH: (shaking Chris's hand) Hey, we won on the big one.
JASPER HUBBELL: Carried the day, Sergeant.
CHRISTINE: (to Mary Beth) You've gotta be shot at to get his tail.
(as the duo leaves the court they see Hubbell talking to David)

[Courthouse corridor]

(Hubbell comes out, looks at the duo and sighs)
CHRISTINE: A deal.
MARY BETH: A deal?! This is attempted murder here.
JASPER HUBBELL: That's exactly why I thought that Mansfield would accept the offer.
CHRISTINE: Wait a minute! I've wasted my time sitting inside that room.
JASPER HUBBELL: It's classically simple. We've got Mansfield and his Defence lawyer to agree on getting us to Lopez. The man deals more drugs. He kills more people than Mansfield. So, for a change of identity and a place in a relocation programme, Mansfield has agreed to rat on Lopez. Criminal economics. A big fish for a bigger fish.
CHRISTINE: And another skunk walks.
JASPER HUBBELL: No, not exactly. ...Yes, he does.
CHRISTINE: (to Mansfield as he and the other two come out) You should rot in hell.
MARY BETH: It's disgusting! Let's get out of here.
JASPER HUBBELL: Don't take it too personally, ladies. It'll only give you ulcers.
MARY BETH: You was robbed too, Mr. Hubbell.
JASPER HUBBELL: Yeah, I know. It tends to happen here. See you at the races, folks.

[Restaurant]

CHARLIE: (as Chris comes rushing in) Chrissie!
CHRISTINE: (sitting down at the table) Hi, Charlie.
CHARLIE: I'm glad you could make it.
CHRISTINE: Sorry, I'm late.
CHARLIE: Oh, that's OK. You sure look like the other side scored today.
CHRISTINE: No we scored. ...And won.
CHARLIE: Oh, ha, ha, that's an old familiar film. (a waitress brings a large carafe of wine) Oh, good. Here. (pointing to Chris) Put it there.
CHRISTINE: Oh no, miss, I'm sorry to refuse.
CHARLIE: (to the waitress) No, no, no, no, no. Honey, it's fine, thank you. (to Chris) This is for you. I ordered it for you. One glass! There you see. You always like a glass of wine with your dinner. Go on! So you went to court today, huh?
CHRISTINE: Yeah.
CHARLIE: Sure as eggs is eggs, you win one on the street, you're gonna get beat in court. Come on, have a little dinner. You'll feel better. (giving her the menu) Here. Here, you wanna get some of that great tomato slice on your appetite.
CHRISTINE: I don't want that. Maybe shrimp cocktail would be good.
CHARLIE: What was that dish you had here the last time that you were so crazy about? Was it the veal chop or something?
(he pours some wine into his empty coffee mug)
CHRISTINE: Charlie!
CHARLIE: Oh, come on, Chrissie, it isn't even booze. It's only twelve-proof. I mean, you get more than that in mouthwash! Hey, they give this to kids in France, you know?
CHRISTINE: Do kids in France get cirrhosis of the liver?! I don't remember hearing that! This stuff will kill you!! Like some people we know!
CHARLIE: Shush.
CHRISTINE: What do you mean?!! Let 'em listen!!! You told me...
CHARLIE: Shush.
CHRISTINE: Don't shush me!!! No!!! How many times have you told me you would stop this?
CHARLIE: All right! I won't drink the damn thing.
(Charlie continues to try and get a word in edgeways)
CHRISTINE: (agitated, irritated) Fine! I'm being rude. Because you're not drinking at all, you bought this wine for me. Right! And I'm being ungrateful. (she pours her wine back in the carafe) No, no, no! (pouring more wine in his mug) Some for you. (raising the carafe to her lips) And some for me!
CHARLIE: Christine!!! Honey, what are you doing?!! (she empties the carafe, half of it down her) Don't do that! (she sits there, sobbing) Christine!
(he gives her his handkerchief to wipe her face but shrugs him off when he tries to comfort her)

[Laceys' hallway]

(Mary Beth, in her dressing gown, turns back from a window and jumps. Harvey has appeared at the bottom of the stairs)
HARVEY: What's going on, Mary Beth?
MARY BETH: I've been pulling down the blinds.
HARVEY: Yeah? You've been out of bed three times already tonight.
MARY BETH: I must go and check Alice.
HARVEY: Three times. She hasn't made a sound. And you've been a nervous wreck for two nights now. Are we gonna play "Twenty Questions" or are you gonna tell me what is going on?
MARY BETH: You promise me you won't go crazy?
HARVEY: When did I last go stir crazy?
MARY BETH: Promise me, Harve.
HARVEY: I promise. What is it, honey?
MARY BETH: (she turns away) Harvey, you'll probably say this it's nothing special. It's not as if he's gonna do anything!
HARVEY: (grabbing her) What's happened to you, babe?! Who?!!
MARY BETH: Gilbert Collins is out.
HARVEY: The one you collared back in seventy-one for rape?!
MARY BETH: Yes.
HARVEY: Where is he?
MARY BETH: You promised me, Harvey.
HARVEY: Where is he?!
MARY BETH: He's working near the Precinct.
HARVEY: I remember what he said he was gonna do to ya. I've got a friend, Mary Beth. We could put the fear of God into him.
MARY BETH: Harvey, he hasn't done anything.
HARVEY: (shouting) He scared you!!! (she puts her face in her hands and puts her head on his shoulder) I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Mary Beth, Mary Beth, I am not gonna let him make the first move.
MARY BETH: I love you, Harve. I love for wanting to protect me, but this is not your job.
HARVEY: The hell it isn't. You are my wife.
MARY BETH: I'm also a cop. How am I supposed feel if I can't take care of myself? What kind of a cop am I gonna be then, Harve?
(she gives him a couple of kisses)

[Manhattan street outside the wine store]

(Collins is shifting cases of wine into the wine store)
MARY BETH: Collins.
COLLINS: Yeah.
MARY BETH: Do you remember me?
COLLINS: Should I?
MARY BETH: My name is Mary Beth Lacey.
COLLINS: Lacey? (turning bitter) You busted me.
MARY BETH: (showing her shield) Sex Register.
COLLINS: So what do you want?
MARY BETH: Sex offenders have to register, Mr. Collins. In the Fourteenth Precinct you haven't done that yet.
COLLINS: My PO called and I'm gonna do it.
CRAVEN: (coming out of the store) Collins! Where's the rest of the apple wine? (seeing Mary Beth) What's the matter? What's up?
MARY BETH: Nothing, sir. I have some information for Mr. Collins.
CRAVEN: What, 'Nothing'? This is becoming a regular stop for you. Now, if there's a problem with this guy, I'll dump him.
MARY BETH: (going up to Craven) No sir. there is no problem. I'll be one minute.
CRAVEN: Are you sure? Collins, I want that stuff in the store fast.
COLLINS: (as Craven goes back into the store) Right.
MARY BETH: (to Collins) Do you remember what you said to me in open court? You threatened me, mister.
COLLINS: Look, Officer, you heard my boss.
MARY BETH: I remember, and I will never forget it.
COLLINS: Does this mean you are going to be in my face every day?!
MARY BETH: I'm gonna be doing my job.
COLLINS: Yeah. Right then.
MARY BETH: Register by Friday, ...Mr. Collins.

[Samuels' office]

CHRISTINE: Mansfield tried to kill me. And no matter how you wanna look at it, Lieutenant, they're gonna give him a prize for it.
SAMUELS: Everybody in this job is a target, Cagney. And we didn't make the deal. The Feds are trading him up! Lopez is worth ten Mansfields to them.
CHRISTINE: You could file a protest or bring some heat in. We could turn this thing around!
(the microwave pings to Chris's frustration)
SAMUELS: Just a sec. It's ready. (taking a plate out of the microwave) Oh, ho, ho. Look at that. Do you know how many times I have tried to get one to look like this with a regular omelette pan? (Chris stands there with her arms folded) Now look at this. It's three kinds of cheese. Oh, wow. Perfect! Here. Try.
CHRISTINE: No, ...thank you, Lieutenant. I wonder what they're serving Mansfield for breakfast at that palace that they call a lock up?
SAMUELS: Come, come. Do you go around your place ...busting up the furniture every time the sun doesn't shine, Sergeant?!
CHRISTINE: I'm tempted to with Mansfield and this attempted murder charge.
SAMUELS: Yeah! Sure! And I was gonna call you and Lacey in this morning to congratulate you on the good work!!
CHRISTINE: (shouting) All of which is for nothing!!
(Samuels raises his arms and shrugs)

[Detectives' Squad room]

PETRIE: (seeing her come in) Mary Beth, Lauren has a set of Dave the Donkey books that she used to love, but they're washable. But you never know how people feel about used things for their children.
MARY BETH: Oh, Marcus, that's so sweet. Harvey and I would love it, and I'm sure she'll love it. Thank you. That's lovely.
PETRIE: How are you doing, Mary Beth?
MARY BETH: I'm OK.
PETRIE: I'm here if you wanna talk.
MARY BETH: Is this about Collins?
PETRIE: Yeah. It's been on my mind.
MARY BETH: Thank you, Marcus.
(she sees Chris go through and follows her)

[Ladies room]

(Chris is checking her hair)
MARY BETH: Morning, Chris.
CHRISTINE: These lights in here are like a coalmine. Have you got a comb? Do you know, just once I would like a case to turn out the way I want it to!
MARY BETH: You ought to be used to it by now.
CHRISTINE: It kills me. Everybody shaking their heads, shrugging their shoulders. Saying, 'Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. That's the way it goes'.
MARY BETH: Ah ha.
CHRISTINE: Why is it that everybody around me turns to butter when it's something I care about? Or even worse. they just jump to the other side!
MARY BETH: Is this what they call female bonding, Christine?
CHRISTINE: No, Mary Beth, this is what they call 'tetchy'.
MARY BETH: So what about David?
CHRISTINE: There's a specimen, huh? Mr. Dependable. Mr. Integrity. I've seen more guts in a violin!
MARY BETH: Chris, I know what things are gonna be like around here until you've finished with this, so why don't you go and talk to him?
CHRISTINE: How's it going with you? How's Alice Christine?
MARY BETH: Alice Christine loves the bouncer. Everybody's fine. How's Charlie doing?
CHRISTINE: You've got me.
(Chris walks out)

[Samuels' office]

(the phone rings)
SAMUELS: (into phone) Yeah. ...What? ...Yes, yes, she is.

[Detectives' Squad room]

MARY BETH: Why don't we treat ourselves? Go to Tony's for lunch.
CHRISTINE: I can't. I need some personal time. I'll be back around two.
MARY BETH: Are you OK?
CHRISTINE: Yeah, I couldn't be better.
MARY BETH: OK.
SAMUELS: (from his office) Lacey.
MARY BETH: Yes sir.

[Samuels' office]

SAMUELS: I've got a parole officer named Kauffman on the phone. She's got a guy called Collins, a parolee in her office. She said you saw him today.
MARY BETH: Yes sir. I talked to him this morning.
SAMUELS: Yeah. What about?!
MARY BETH: He's supposed to register.
SAMUELS: Well, he's shaking in his pants. Whatever you said to him, he's too scared to go back to work, much less come by here.
MARY BETH: Sir, I did not threaten him.
SAMUELS: According to her, Collins made some bad moves up in Attica and now he's terrified of being sent back there.
MARY BETH: What's that got to do with me, sir?
SAMUELS: Well, she wants you to get on the phone and reassure him. You know? A few nice words from you so he can pull himself back together and go back to work. So do it!
MARY BETH: Yes sir. Can I use your phone.
(he hands her the phone)
MARY BETH: (into phone) This is Detective Lacey.

[Holding cell, Criminal Courts Building]

(Chris comes in. Mansfield, in a Metropolitan Correctional Center outfit, is watching TV)
BRUCE MANSFIELD: Oh boy! (he switches off the TV) Surprise! Fate has rewarded me by bringing us together in a room with a bed. (sitting down on the bed) Make yourself comfortable.
CHRISTINE: No thanks. Just seeing you locked up is comfort enough.
BRUCE MANSFIELD: It's just a temporary condition. Would you like a drink? (he laughs, she turns away) It's a joke. Again, a temporary inconvenience. I offer you a rain check.
CHRISTINE: It's a tough one, Mansfield. Being here knowing you beat me again.
BRUCE MANSFIELD: It's a game you don't understand, Christine. May I call you Christine?
CHRISTINE: No.
BRUCE MANSFIELD: Fair enough. You don't understand the game, so you don't play it well. In a sense, I think you played it professionally when you were still in uniform.
CHRISTINE: So where's it gonna be? Arizona? Florida? Some place posh around LA?
BRUCE MANSFIELD: Well, location is special. The thing I like best about all of this is the business they're setting me up in. (beginning to snigger) I'm afraid I can't give you some of the details.
CHRISTINE: Lopez was a smart move. Big name at exactly the right time. I bet you even have one or two other names you might use.
BRUCE MANSFIELD: Ah, so that's what this is? You're looking for a name to take back to your lieutenant. You haven't been listening, Christine. The player never gives anything away unless the payoff is worthwhile.
CHRISTINE: I'm out of class here. I'll miss you so much.
BRUCE MANSFIELD: Oh, going already?
CHRISTINE: Yeah. About the payoff being worthwhile. Do you mean when somebody who knows where you're hiding, finally sells you out to Lopez, and he's gonna come looking to blow your brains out. Is that the kind of payoff you mean?! You tried to kill me. You could have done it then and walked away. But instead you chose to sweat and wait for your nice biggest payoff in a hundred years.
BRUCE MANSFIELD: Get out.
CHRISTINE: My pleasure. (from the door) You're right, Mansfield, it isn't a game for me.
(she knocks and is let out)

[Outside the Criminal Courts Building]

(David runs out after her)
DAVID KEELER: Hey, Chris! Chris! Look, I'm glad it's over. Maybe we can talk now. We can go to a place and sit down and talk! (she walks away) Chris! Chris!! ...Come on, Chris!!!
(she carries on walking)

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